5 Ways to Teach Your Toddler About Responsibility

If you are a parent of a toddler, you’re probably surprised at how often they seem like a little adult. Not only are they beginning to test boundaries, but they are also trying to negotiate with you—and learn more about how to navigate their way through the world. Rest assured, it’ll be quite some time before your little one truly becomes independent. Even so, it’s helpful to teach them about virtues like responsibility as early as possible.

According to pediatric psychologists, exploring self-awareness and accountability helps keep your child from making excuses for negative behavior in the future. If you’re wondering how to get started, we’ll help you learn some of the most age-appropriate responsibility activities and lessons for toddlers. By practicing the strategies below, you will build them a solid foundation for when they get ready to enter kindergarten or preschool.

1. Ask Them to Complete Simple Tasks 

Most toddler boys and girls are able to keep an attention span, understand commands and use an exceptional amount of manual dexterity by 18 months of age. Once they reach this milestone, you can begin asking them to complete simple tasks, like stacking a set of blocks, picking up their plastic fork after dropping it on the ground or putting their shirt in their drawer. Don’t make the request too complicated—and expect for there to be some mishaps along the way. The key is that your child is responding to your question and learning that being asked to help is commonplace.

Avoid making them repeat an activity until they reach perfection. Instead, respond to their willingness to assist with praise. If you follow this formula, they’ll begin to associate responsibility with positive feelings. As they grow older and move on to more complicated chores, like feeding the dog or cleaning up their mess, they’ll be less likely to argue or have a temper tantrum.

2. Explore Consequences

You may think you’re being a kind parent by avoiding hard and fast rules, but a lack of consequences can lead to issues down the road. If your little one never learns to pick up after themselves or help their younger siblings, they will find it harder to follow directions in school. Decide which household guidelines are important to you. They may be as simple as putting away toys and art supplies after play time and eating at least some of their meal at dinner.

If your toddler doesn’t follow the rules, give them simple and clear outcomes. For example, leaving crayons on the kitchen table means that there’s no coloring time tomorrow—or refusing to eat any spaghetti means they won’t get to try dessert. Stay firm with your consequences and let your child work through the emotions that come with them. Resisting the urge to rescue your son or daughter from frustration and anger will help them with problem solving down the road.

3. Create Structure

Part of learning how to be responsible is knowing that there are things you must do before you engage in activities you like to do. Whether it’s the weekend, holiday break or summer, create and stick with a schedule. One of the most basic ways to implement structure is sticking with a morning routine. For instance, your little one may need to eat breakfast and brush their teeth before they can continue on with the day.

You can also add responsibilities to their nighttime schedule. A bath could be necessary before reading an exciting story and heading off to bed. If they resist, remember the importance of consequences. Help them decide whether they’d rather get in the tub now or miss story time altogether.

4. Enlist Some Help

If you offer a variety of engaging opportunities for discovering responsibility, your child will learn and adapt faster. Play games, read books and turn on television shows focused on consequences and good behavior. Sesame Street and Tayo the Little Bus are just two of the most popular toddler TV programs that teach lessons and explore how to do the right thing. Family movies like Frozen, Up and The Lion King are also both educational and entertaining.

Add a few responsibility reads like Why Do I Have to Make My Bed? and I Just Forgot to your usual bookshelf favorites. Even if your kid doesn’t understand every storyline, it helps to get them started with positive messages early. Start by getting them acquainted with responsible characters and soon enough they’ll begin to absorb how their favorite cartoons fulfill their obligations and duties.

5. Model Responsible Behavior  

Since your child is watching your every move, make sure you’re showing them how to be responsible. Communicate with them about what you’re doing and why it’s important. Involve them when you pick up your dirty laundry or brush your teeth. Tell them that putting clothes in the hamper keeps the house tidy and that using a toothbrush and toothpaste each night keeps their teeth healthy.

As you continue to model good behavior, consider using the pronoun “we” instead of “I.” This simple grammatical change allows your child to become an active participant in discovering how to be responsible. They’ll also learn family rules and norms much easier.

Teaching Responsibility Early Offers Many Rewards Later

The more time and effort you put into responsibility lessons now, the easier it will be for your kid to complete important tasks in their grade school years and beyond. They’ll be more likely to do their homework, will give you less of a hard time during Sunday chores and won’t be confused when you explain why it’s necessary to fulfill certain academic and personal obligations.

We’re not saying that your kid isn’t just that—a kid. There will be hiccups, no matter how hard you try. However, you can find peace of mind in knowing that a few moments of persistence each day will pay off when it’s time for your child to work hard, get good grades and become a responsible pre-teen, teenager and adult.


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