I have an 18-year-old, and don't I feel old? Not at all! In fact, I feel small! LOL
My elder son, Gabo, whom I nicknamed after the Colombian novelist Gabriel GarcÃa Márquez, has always been our source of pride and joy. From the time he started school (at 4 years old), he has always enjoyed going to school. I can't remember a time that he expressed boredom or any desire to be absent. He never even wanted to be late!
He always wants to be in school and not just being there but actively present in all academic and exrta-curricular activities. And every day since, till to this day, he always has stories to tell.
Gabo and I (including his first and second nanny and the whole household) didn't have an easy start though. When he was only a few days' old, he would be crying all the time. He wouldn't want to be laid down. I had to sit and hold him in my arms from midnight till morning because if I would lay him down to the bed or his crib, he would wail! That crying and wailing lasted till he was two years old, I think. Ha ha!
When he was about two years old, he was not very friendly as well. Several times, he bit his playmates and quarreled with them. That started me worried about his social skills. But, we just observed his behavior.
Thankfully, when he got a little older and wiser, he changed for the better. He became the most friendly and loving child to all of us. I observed that the change in behavior began when he was able to appreciate his birthday parties. Every year till his seventh year, we would throw a big party for him (and his younger brother) with all the party paraphernalia. In fact, his friends in the neighborhood look forward to his parties every year. Only then did he become more sociable.
I think that's the purpose of birthday parties---they teach us to socialize, make and keep friends.
In his early years, Gabo would easily get cough which would often end up as asthma. Being an active young boy, he would be running around the neighborhood with his friends, and when he would fall or trip, for sure the next day, he would be coughing. So, we would bring him to his pediatrician every time.
Then one day, we learned that swimming is a good and effective cure for asthma. So, we would let his nanny take him to the villas clubhouse and let him play and swim. That went on for sometime until we noticed that they had stopped going. When we asked, we found out that Gabo almost drowned or felt that he was drowning when the nanny failed to hold him tightly.
Oh no! Phobia will not have a day in the life of my kid!
We immediately enrolled him at Lozada's Swimming Classes. By doing so, we would be hitting two birds (be cured from his asthma and get over his phobia) with one stone so to speak. At first, Gabo was hesitant even to go to the pool. But slowly, he conquered his fears and survived his phobia, and no longer suffers from asthma! He has become a good swimmer, even winning medals in his school swimming competition.
See him in action here when he was learning to swim and play basketball.
It really pays to be attuned to your child's day-to-day struggles and triumphs, and help him deal with it early on.
For the past 18 years, Gabo has kept on conquering challenges both in academics and sports. He has it easy, in fact. He may not be number one in his classes though he has good grades, but he occupies a comfortable niche that he won't go unnoticed or be forgotten by his classmates and teachers, and even by his friends. He is quite popular among his peers and a favorite of his teachers! He he!
Our relationship is not without bumps. We disagree on some things and agree on other things. He has a tendency to insist and stand by his decision even if it's a bit off. We would put our foot down, of course, after showing him the pros and cons of his decision. I for one would always end the argument by telling him,
"You take a long hard look, Gab, if what you are going for will be good or bad for you. I think you already know what is good and bad." He would go quiet for a few hours, go to his room or any other spot in the house, and then would come back to me and hug me and say sorry. Even now
in his senior high school and he stays in a condo near his university, we would deal with him the same way, and the ending would always be him acquiescing and seeing the value of what we are trying to tell him.
It is not easy, as we are aware of kids rebelling or getting depressed from being reprimanded. So, we strike a balance of being strict and loose, but always making him feel that we are here ready to listen to him, see his side of the story, and that he is welcome to decide for himself but with our guidance still.
Gabo will be entering college in five months' time and will be pursuing an engineering course just like his father. He will be taking civil engineering.
I pray to the Lord Almighty that He will guide him in all his undertakings and keep him away from temptations that would hinder him from fulfilling his dreams.
I can see that he is a good man; a loving son, brother, grandson, and friend.
As for me and my husband and family, we will be here supporting him 101%! We love him dearly!
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